I used to be very afraid of being alone, I have never thought of not having someone by my side. I always want that someone to always be close to me. I have never liked or loved someone who would be faraway from me. I'm a gemini. I know believing in horoscopes is a total bs when some are totally not accurate at all. Yet mostly on gemini are so accurate and totally right on the spot which I have to say, I do believe in it. I thought I can be independence, but there are still times I have to say I can't be alone and there must be at least someone there for me...

I gave up on someone in April right after April's fool day. People thought I was pulling a prank on them. Probably I did told them it was a lie. Yet months before, I have thought of it. It was time that either I gave up on him or myself. That's when I thought... Who can stand it when you realise your visions for the future are getting unclear and blurry? You thought this person who you loved so much, ended up making you unbearable because of nothing but the unclear paths. I wanted to settle very much because I always know myself in a relationship that I would not stop trying...

I was lost for at least two months, I couldn't find myself. I was a fool myself and I didn't know what I wanted anymore. During these periods, I met people and I lost them too. I'm not someone who lied about where I knew or met them. I have to admit, I used those apps too. Everyone knows there are certain groups in the apps. Being cautious and careful are what I have to be in order to use it.


There I came across this guy, I thought he looked appealing in his profile picture. So I went to look and started a conversation with him. Little did I know that he's not local and that he is heading back to his hometown. Well, the day I matched with him, we chatted until 3am. We had common interests and yet, we didn't have it totally the same. What's more, he didn't see my profile among all the girls...

I thought it was a pity to let him go when we could talk pretty much everything, e.g. our interests and etc. I told him if we could be chat buddies instead.

Ended up, we decided to meet up and hang out together. Well, of course I was reserved that day while he was the one engaging me into conversations all the time. We were so attracted to each other and decided to meet up again. Yes, we are still meeting up and while you're guessing, we're now an item together.

It's not that time where we decided to be a couple. It was definitely after much thoughts that he decided to ask me to be his girlfriend almost more than a month ago. I was elated to be his girlfriend and I knew it is going to be very tough. I asked around for helps to assure myself that it is going to work out. In some cases, Long Distance Relationship (LDR) works and some don't work. Honestly speaking, I am sure that I can deal with it...


Time flies really fast, everytime we hang out together, we feel as if we have known each other for so long. In less than a month week, he'd be flying back to his hometown. I'd be very devastated but I tell myself to be determined and wait for his return. I am going to handle this LDR well, like he assures me that he'd be back for me.

I know I'm going to miss this guy a lot.
I know I love this guy deeply now.
I know I'm happy, if he's happy no matter where we are.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

If you ever see this, I hope you will always remember where I stand.
I will always stay where I am,
With my hands reaching out for you to hold them again.
Be safe back there, do what you need to do.
I will see you again in two months time,
Who knows in another year or two after that...
Nevertheless,
I love you, my O. B. Chou.
Posted by Zephnelaine ❣ 0 comment/s Tweet